The Snow Giraffe Blogs

Meet your olympic mascots via this insane video.

Miga named after sandwiches in Argentina with the crusts cut off, is a Shamu killer whale. You can tell that he is from canada because he snowboards and has legs. I suppose the true mark of authenticity would be the bong under the flipper action which was omitted due to the michael phelps incident.

Quachi is clearly a sasquatch that loves hockey. However, it turns out that he lost his water pipe in Alaska after blowing up Hawaii in a F14 tomcat.

I dont know what the other marmot thing is. Maybe he is a luge star. Though I would have chosen a giraffe. And how do you get into that luging? Are you really good at falling on ice and your giraffe mom is like, “dude, look how much potential your blue tongue has for licking ice. Jesus christ I’m a giraffe, Get in the kitchen!” and enrolls you in luge school? Lotta vodka in luge school. And giraffes at are really good at going fast and being unable to stop. Or maybe that is me projecting. I could have been a luge star. WTF. I am a luge star!